A new study reveals that Americans have the DNA of Neanderthals.
"It is as if the the DNA has become a virus," senior scientist Skinner Jung said when the results of the study were presented at Georgetown University. "Why the brains of white men are most affected is still a mystery."
Sadly, no cure or way to prevent the Neanderthal Strain is possible at this time.
One particular white male who participated in the study brought some levity to the presentation by asking how Obama was still President when he and so many others like him voted Republican in the 2014 election.
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