Day of the Dead, 2025

Darryl's death has left me feeling half a ghost myself. The idea of death as a release from a grim world of suffering is certainly appealing.  Nonetheless, the Day of the Dead is a time to celebrate the joys, the adventures, the achievements, the beauty of those we have loved who are no longer alive. 

Darryl, the Love of my Life, a kind, generous, thoughtful humanitarian, will always be remembered for his wit, his intelligence, his knowledge of history, culture, the arts, music, and the articles he published on medicine. President of the American Medical Writers Atlanta chapter, Darryl attended international conferences, gave lectures and papers on medicine, attended a Harvard Neurology session in New England, and won awards for articles such as the one he wrote on Alzheimer's. 

Darryl made our travels around the world all the more exciting because of his knowledge of the places, events, cultural achievements, and life of the cities and countries we visited.  Whether in Patagonia seeing the blue Moreno Glacier, or Prague with its history and literary heritage, where we saw Don Giovanni in the theater where Mozart himself directed, or the many plays on Broadway, including Angels in America, Darryl's familiarity always enhanced our experience. I shall always see him being carried through the streets of Amsterdam like the god he was to perform on stage. He waved at the people enjoying their outdoor cafes as his entourage attended to him and lifted his palanquin. His performance as Poseidon's lover was attended by over a thousand people and was great fun. 

Darryl's presence fills our house, his taste and artistic choices fill every room, from the Whirling Dervish he brought back from Egypt, to the jade dragon he found in San Francisco, to bark paintings from Mexico, to the Day of the Dead figure he bought in Guanajuato.    

 

This year two other friends of mine died: Lee Killian whom I have known my entire life, and Katie Nachod, whom I have known since Graduate School at Tulane in the 1970s

Add to them the Spirits of Jake, Jim, and Julian:

 Let us also celebrate the Spirits of my parents and grandparents. Here is a link to a celebration of the wonderful, now dead,  people in my life:

https://www.facebook.com/jack.miller/posts/pfbid02ajichb8M4vH2G81zDX6MT3rbdWnz3sjGWXJRPeS5sdgpQXcsi53GLmKccsigisHCl

Lake Rabun Hotel, Blue Ridge Parkway, The Pisgah Inn, Asheville-- October 2025

 Nine days of introspection and precious time with friends have been nourishing. There were days alone and days of deep friendship. Brother John and I hiked the sacred grounds of Graveyard Fields again, revisiting the bridge, streams, and waterfall where last summer we took Darryl's ashes. Our mother's ashes and John's beloved Carlann's ashes are also there. It is a splendid setting aglow with cool, bright, sunny weather and the full color of the autumn trees. 

John and I stayed at the Pisgah Inn where Darryl and I stayed countless times. The fall colors and the autumn days were spectacular:

John on the Pisgah Trail

Will drove up from Asheville and spent the day with us. We hiked trails each day.

Dinner with John and Will

View from our balcony

Before driving the Parkway to the Pisgah Inn, I spent two nights at the Lake Rabun Hotel in the room Darryl and I shared on our last trip there. It is a spacious, lovely room. On my second day, reading on the front porch, I met Carl and Lauren. We talked about travel and our lives, of their relationship as they celebrated their 10th anniversary, and of my 35 years with Darryl. We talked of music, of Carl's performances around the world of classical and folk music, including his playing violin, fiddle, and harmonica. I talked of Will, of his musical background, of his recent recordings and performances. We shared a bottle of wine on the porch, and another over dinner. The fish was superb. Perhaps we shall meet again.

Witham Point Room

 Carl and Lauren

https://www.lakerabunhotel.com/lodging/

After the trails of the Blue Ridge Mountains, after dinner with Will and John at the Pisgah Inn, John and I took the Parkway down to Asheville. Steve Killian joined John, and Will joined me. I did laundry at Will's apartment. 

It was an intimate time for Will and me in my hotel, with its balcony and panoramic view of the mountains. We were glad to have time and space with each other. There is little we did not discuss, from Will's lyrics and recordings to my continued grief over the absence of Darryl. Will's love and care for me have been essential to my dealing with what is to me cruelty, absurdity, violence, the inhumanity of today's world. 

We met John and Steve at Malaprops in the afternoon. I bought the new Ian McEwan novel Maggie recommended. For dinner we dined at Will's favorite Indian Restaurant, Chai Pani,  and had a delightful  taste of food from India. 

The next day John departed for Savannah. Will and I spent much of the day together, then joined Steve for dinner at Tupelo Honey. 

On Friday, Will played a few songs he is working on for me. He even impressed the woman who works at the complex where he lives. A large photograph of Stevie Nicks graced the room where he performed.

 I drove a good 80 miles or more along the Blue ridge Parkway again, stopping at many of the gorgeous overlooks. 

By 4 or so I was back at the Dillard House for two nights, another of Darryl's and my regular places. Saturday was BBQ Ribs (another Darryl favorite) day and I ate heartily. Still I was sad I could not join Will at the "No Kings" rally and protest in Asheville. Will told me later that thousands of people were there celebrating democracy and the freedoms guaranteed by our Constitution. Will even purchased what turned out to be an excellent poem. 

Here are a few photographs from the Dillard Farm, soon to be the Dillard Resort:

A Yellow Rose for Darryl

Jack Jameson